it just hit me how incredibly busy i'm going to be this weekend....
more so how i kinda have a life now, ha!

10/27 Lacee arrives; check in and head to RAGE

10/28 Possible beach day, Possible Microbrew at the Santa Anita race track, "Drag" races in WEHO, then Nightmare Before Christmas in 3-D @ El Capitan

10/29 Six Flag Fright Fest or Knott's Scary Farm, either way I'm going to pee my pants because i HATE scary things.

10/30 Relax...? Shopping for clothes for formal

10/31 Halloween in WEHO

Last night Sarah and I checked out her sister's boyfriend's band, Capulet. They were pretty sweet. Then we ate pancakes til 2am. Good times.
Tonight its sushi night at Gin's, yay!

Ok, back to lame phone conference.

i'm going to PI PHI formal in less than a month? eeek!
impressed yet terrified at the moment.
more so, what the hell do i wear?

what are people going to say?

so i just wrote this really long post about my night last night and how i came to find things about myself and blah blah blah, then blogdrive erased it. ARGH.

in short--

self reflection in another is a creepy thing, but it was worth it. i vow to not be like H and not let things affect me so deeply, it'll be hard but its worth the effort.

two i miss the LLs and night out with them last night reminded me that we had such good times together, but people change, we grow up, and now people are where they should be...for now...

i feel bad when mutual friends who are basically dumped on me cant dance and dont fit in my with my group of friends. ugh, i feel horrible but its a case of the cool kids vs. the newbies...oh well...

and lastly, my past has some amazing moments which will forever be etched in my memory and no matter what i shouldnt feel the need to give those up--those were genuine times, places, things, emotions, etc....and they are mine.

the schedule for tonight...

pick up sarah at somepoint and head out again...although i will be missing degrassi but then i can catch that all weekend on the n. heh.

...is it possible that tory has begun to grow up?

***EDIT EDIT EDIT***
10/20/2006

thankfully this situation was recently remedied....regardless we all know i'm wimp and could never phsyically hurt anyone--it was a vengeful rage that needed to be expressed....however its over and done with.

in fact thats not how i feel.
the reality is i've never wanted to physically cause harm to anyone until now.

if i ever see them again i will more then likely want to beat the shit out of them, but knowing me i will instead attempt to be polite but then turn into a jerk and cuss them out.

i'm sick of being the one that gets stuck with the left over feelings.

"...know that i dont regret anything" ok fuckface you just sealed your fate with me, if  i ever see you again you'd best run because i will not back down, i will fuck you up. thats a guarantee.

dear gina,

you were right.

so i had this big old long blog about my life, this weekend, and blah blah but blogdrive sucks and it didnt post it.

i dont feel like writing it over for now....maybe later.

off to blanes for a burger, then off to meet up with lacee at the mall.

So this is odd, the painful realization that has all gone wrong. And nobody cares at all, and nobody cares at all.

So you buried all your lover's clothes and burned the letters lover wrote, but it doesn't make it any better. Does it make it any better? And the plaster dented from your fist in the hall where you had your first kiss reminds you that the memories will fade.

So this is strange, our sidestepping has come to be a brilliant dance where nobody leads at all, where nobody leads at all.

And the picture frames are facing down and the ringing from this empty sound is deafening and keeping you from sleep. And breathing is a foreign task and thinking's just too much to ask and you're measuring your minutes by a clock that's blinking eights.

This is incredible. Starving, insatiable, yes, this is love for the first time. Well you'd like to think that you were invincible. Yeah, well weren't we all once before we felt loss for the first time? Well this is the last time.

so going camping didnt happen.

honestly after this weekend though i'm never planning a trip with more then two people, ok maybe more then two but everyone has to get along and not annoy the shit out of me, LOL.

so friday i get off work and i'm all stoaked to go pick up the rental car from national rentals. i take my lil taxi down there and show up, placing my license and debit/credit card on the counter. i was all smiles til the lady looked at my card and was like oh, we dont take debit cards.

me: but its a credit card too, i mean i use it as a credit card and theres money to cover it in there.

her: well we dont take them.

me: *blank stare* hmmmm. ok let me make a phone call.

so i in turn call saunder who its like, yeah i have a credit card...so he hops in a taxi and comes over to the airport. well turns out he didnt bring his license from holland. shit. so i call mellisa who calls the national customer service line to get info, while i call stanley who isnt answering his phone, then i call lacee, just cuz...LOL....and then we stand and glare at the mean lady who wont let us have our car for the weekend. then mellisa calls saying verity is on her way over with a license and plain old credit card, REJOYCE! meanwhile stanley had called back, offered to pay for the car on his credit card (LOVE him now) but the mean lady was like ummm we cant do that for fear of idenity theft. bitch.

so verity shows up, we're elated---head to the desk and BAM. its a credit/DEBIT card. sad day. so we sadly hitch a ride home with some nice people who actually got their rental car and the weekend of camping ends right then and there.

mind you i had been up FAIRLY late the night before so by the time i got home from the rental car fiasco i just wanted to sleep. sleep i did. for 12 hours. it was SO nice. plus i got to be with my moushe which is ALWAYS a plus. so moushe and i slept for 12 hours straight while everyone else went out drinking or something.

so saturday is a cloudy gloomy day and i'm completely over the camping thing. i just know that i have an entire weekend off and nothing to do, rather all the time to do anything but no means to get there.

so mellisa who is hell bent on going somewhere calls up enterprise and AMAZING! they have a van for rent---so we tackle the nice guy james in the lobby because he has a car and of course the taxis arent running and he jets off to enterprise with alison and i in tow.

so get there at 12.07pm thinking we've lost the car because they close at 12pm sharp but thank GOD they were still open. so we get the car and things are looking up.

if saunder hadnt had been there the rest of the weekend life would have been sweet. but no, hes complaining the entire time about not camping and blah blah.

basically we ended up at the beach for sat afternoon and hit some waterfalls.

sunday was the day from hell.

we drive all the way to kona to be met with rain and a hike from hell. so i ditched them on the hike and went on my own adventure. i wanted to kill saunder. literally drowned him in the ocean or push him down the lava fields.

either way thank GOD alison was there or else i would have died.

pics will be up soon.

not much else to write....for now.

ask me why.

i wont tell.

oh man.

napping the previous afternoon should help---lets hope.

we got room keys.

i am going to pass out at the beach later tonight.

YAY FOR CAMPING, SURFING, SNORKELING, and maybe a gay bar? teehee.

and OMG I GET TO PLUG MY iPOD into speakers and drive around!!!!

ahhhhhhh so excited!